Saturday, November 10, 2012

Pillar of Flame

"Eternal Annexation" - by Rassouli
Pulled Avnas today. He represents enlightenment, and promises good fortune if one is calm and insightful. I think that's pretty appropriate. 

I had a night full of interesting dreams. Unfortunately, I don't remember specific details, but I know there were bits and pieces and references to all sorts of things I've been interacting with, such as Once Upon a Time, which I began watching yesterday. There might have been some Harry Potter and Supernatural in there, too. I just know the general theme of the content. 

I've officially hit checkout mode. I spent almost all day yesterday working on homework/projects. Math and storyboarding to be specific. With the exception of one panel, I'm done with the shading part - now I just have to color them digitally, but that shouldn't take long. I'm just done, though. I still have a self-portrait to start and finish; fortunately that's due on Thursday. And a couple of minor assignments left that I can hardly bring myself to do. I'm ready to be lazy. 

It doesn't help that I've hit a wall for my writing, either. Of course, it's on hold because of all the crap I have to do this weekend, but I have been thinking about it, and I'm getting nervous because I can't come up with anything solid and interesting. I keep reminding myself that fabulous projects can't be rushed, but the busybody in me sees time that's being wasted, and it thinks: "we need to come up with something NOW!"

And to make matters worse, my dad says he needs my laptop for our trip to Louisiana in a couple weeks so he can do his homework - I was planning on using it for Nano. 

I guess I might have to up my word count some other way. But I just told him that I was going to use my laptop over there and he said, "Well, hurry up and finish because I need it for my homework."

Speaking of novels... I'm feeling a bit flustered because I have this incredible urge to turn VotS into a book - or at least write one containing similar messages. I felt this before but I figured I would just keep blogging because it was a bit easier and I had a pretty design for it. But the feeling is back and I'm wondering if perhaps it relates to my desire to become a spiritual teacher - because when I think about it, a lot of today's teachers are made known through some kind of book(s) they wrote. And I hope this doesn't sound elitist, but I feel like this book might just be the "big thing" that puts me out there in the life I desire. 

I've always been one to follow my gut. It's never led me astray. So I asked the Psychic Tarot, and interestingly enough, I received Emotional Loss, Heartache & Loss, Disruption and Passion Ignited. TWO heart-based loss cards? I'm not sure what that suggests. But when I consulted angel cards, I got back-to-back "this is all in your best interest" type cards... relating to my purpose, saying that my desires are being manifested, etc. Then again, this is a very, very general source and not as personal, so I'm not sure which way to swing, unless I ask one of my own decks again. Maybe I'll ask Gita. 

...Okay. I'm a little shocked. Grief came up. But Determination was stuck to Grief. I also pulled Fall from Grace, and, hilariously, The Source of All, which is essentially this deck's "Creator" or "Adonai" card. 

What kind of emotional loss would be associated with publishing a book? Otherwise, I know what Gita is warning against. It looks like I have a balance here, and although I can't understand what heartache, loss, and grief have to do with publishing, I'm assuming there's a reason why I'm feeling this incredible urge to write such a book... again. The Source of All and Passion Ignited - not to mention the angel cards - all say yes, it's in my best interest to do so. But some kind of loss or disruption might stand in my way?

One last thing before I run off to get busy on homework - I'm thinking about moving my blog(s) to my own account. I haven't decided for sure yet, but it's just that I'm getting a few more ideas for new blogs, and I'm also thinking about possibly monetizing them for a bit of extra cash. I was considering making an official blog - one with its own domain and whatnot - but unfortunately I'm not that familiar with html and website design, so I might sit on that for the future. 

Work time.

Evaah  

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