Year of the Snake

"Medusa" - by Rob Shields

Although I'm a little sad to see Year of the Dragon go, I have to admit I'm very happy to see Snake arrive. Like dragons, snakes hold a special place in my heart. I love them to bits. And I feel like this is a good year for them to represent... shedding. 

I pulled two cards from my Wildwood deck, asking El'azar what I should work on at this time (or what I can eliminate). The cards that I pulled were Nine of Vessels - Generosity and Six of Bows - Abundance. Funny, because I looked at the Generosity card first without acknowledging the name and thought, "Oh, that looks like abundance."

Generosity and abundance... The former I can understand easily, although I have mixed feelings about my generosity. Do I give enough? Sometimes I feel like I do. I try to help whenever I can, give whatever I can. But there are times when I'm burnt out or need to hold on to something... 

Interesting, though. Generosity and abundance are obviously connected to one another, so what is El'azar trying to say here? That I need to be more abundant with my generosity? If that's the case, I certainly wasn't expecting this. 

What strikes me as interesting for the Abundance card is that the abundance is depicted (barrels of fruits and veggies), but no one is around to enjoy it. There is evidence people are close (a lit fire), yet the abundance remains untouched - as though it's being saved or savored. Appreciated, maybe?

Gratitude... I haven't been as actively grateful as I'd like to be. There are times when I do express gratitude for the small things: a gap in traffic, safety in my travels, a good parking spot. Of course, I'm grateful in my heart for everything else in my life, but I don't acknowledge that gratitude actively; that is, I don't say thank you for every little thing. 

I suppose while I'm in this dark(er) moment of my life, I should reflect on these things. Because the source of my troubles is worrying about the future and not being able to live the way I want to live. But when I actually remind myself, I have a pretty good life. Perhaps I'm not happy with having to go to school and acquire a job; however, when I think about it, I'm in a decent situation to change all that, or at least make the most of what it is I do end up doing until things shift globally for the better. I'm not rich, but I'm not poor. Therefore, I have the room or capability to do more of what I want to do. It'll take baby steps, sure... in the end, though, I know that I'll receive whatever is most appropriate for me. 

So as Year of the Snake begins, I have made it a general goal to transform and acquire a new skin. Something fresh and new and far less dull and itchy. I will appreciate what I have and give as much as I can to others in hopes that my own generosity will inspire theirs. I'll develop a good sense of adventure...

On a last note, I was thinking about Andromeda yesterday while I went about my tasks. It seems to be more and more fitting, despite meaning "ruler of men." I'm actually more interested in the galaxy then the actual mythological figure, although the latter still does make sense when I think about what I want to contribute to the world as an artist. To some degree.

I won't jump into anything just yet, though. I'm in no rush. I'd like to be at least in the process of developing a certain personal style before committing myself to more blogs and websites. I want to be happy with my work. So I'll let it stew... and maybe in a few more months - hopefully around my summer break - I'll be somewhere where I'm content with what I'm producing, even if it's in the drafting stages. 

I have all the time in the world... and if it doesn't work out, then it wasn't meant to be.
But I need to be honest with myself. I need to work from my heart.

Happy CNY!