Overcast

by kateey @ deviantART.com

Gotta love rainy days.  

They're even better when you get to spend them alone in peace and quiet. 

My dream this morning was school-themed again. I believe that makes it the fourth school-related dream I've had in the past week. I feel like there could be three or more meanings behind it, so I'm not exactly sure what it's referring to. 

I read two articles today that were relevant to my previous post: one about wheat and one about fluoride in tap water. 

First, regarding wheat... I discovered that link through a friend on Facebook, who is starting a wheat-free diet today (I think she has some stomach troubles with it). It definitely grabbed my attention because, as I mentioned before, I'm a pasta-lover, and a lot of carbs I eat are some form of wheat (mainly pasta and bread). But I was unaware of what the linked article mentioned: the presence of an opiate in modern wheat called gliadin, which "stimulates the appetite such that [people] consume 440 more calories a day, 365 days per year."

That means, on average, those who consume wheat-based products on a regular basis consume about 160,000 more calories a year than those who don't.

Now, for some of us, that isn't a horrible thing. I tend to consume about 1000-1200 calories a day - give or take, depending on what it is I'm eating. I consume an average of 300-500 calories per "meal" (lunch and dinner), with maybe 100-300 calories extra, counting evening snacks.

The average daily caloric intake for Americans in 2003 was about 2700. I couldn't really find anything more recent than that; I would imagine it's about the same - if not worse - today. Livestrong suggests that a "moderately active" woman consume about 1800-2000 calories a day. I don't think I ever eat that much in a day, unless I'm splurging, or am in Louisiana (lol). 

But I digress. The point is, wheat has been identified as a "poison" - and apparently, people who cut it from their diet are losing anywhere from 30-150 pounds, and are seeing relief with ailments such as arthritis, depression, and IBS. Actually, I knew that wheat was a big IBS trigger for some (gluten?). But because it's not for me, I never thought about what "modern wheat" actually is. The other day, Mom mentioned a book she'd been reading that suggested we shouldn't be eating wheat at all.

The look of horror on my face, I swear.

Now, as far as the fluoride spiel is concerned... all that article really said was that two years ago or so, the government decided it wanted fluoride levels in water decreased because it was found to cause all sorts of problems in children. I wasn't actually aware of that, either. I just figured the government would do what it does best: screw people over and keep the fluoride in there. I'm hoping that maybe, just maybe, the government will realize that having fluoride in our water doesn't do us any good whatsoever - and that includes the "cavity prevention." 

Plus, fluoride makes our water taste like crap. I remember drinking the water in Italy and being unable to distinguish between water served at the restaurants and water served from the city fountains. And no - I'm not saying that the restaurant water tasted bad. I'm saying that it was freaking delicious.    

 Apparently, companies are making fluoride micro-dissolving to the point where reverse osmosis filters are unable to filter it out. I'm not sure if this is actually true, but if it is, I'm a bit miffed. I've been thinking about what I'm going to do once my parents live overseas - since I'll be doing the grocery shopping for myself. A reverse osmosis filter system is pretty expensive ($150 ish), so I was thinking I could just buy distilled gallon jugs instead. This makes me a little sad, though, because that means more plastic wasted and more money spent (we currently use a PUR filter system to drink tap water). Oh, well. Gotta make some sacrifices, I guess. 

But fluoride and wheat aside.. Leon-cat is getting more tame. He's still not comfortable if you make a move toward him (like approach him), but he's totally cool with you sitting a step or two away so long as you're still. Since it began raining while I was preparing his food, I let him come onto the back patio to eat... but because I did, he began making efforts to come inside; I think he's now beginning to associate inside with food. I had to keep closing the door to ensure I didn't have a cat roaming through the house.

Here's a phone pic of the fluffball (through the glass, since he would've come in if I opened the door):

Cute, ain't he? (Or she? Still have no idea) I love cat personalities, even though they always look like they're pissed at you. I just hope he's keeping dry somewhere, because it's been raining pretty well here for the past few hours. 

Eron plot-building is going well. I'm getting a lot of good ideas that I should probably be writing down... only I keep getting distracted by other things. 

Time to tackle a reading or two... 
 
 

Inhale, Exhale

by emilieleger @ deviantART.com

I am very flustered right now, for two main reasons. 

One, because I just watched the newest episode of Merlin, and two, because I don't know what the hell to do with myself.

Yes. The ending of 5x11 had me flipping out. It's so very exciting. I never imagined I'd be saying this, but I wish it were next week already. I'm going to need so many distractions to keep me from yearning for the 22nd and 24th. I guess I should be grateful that I'm actually able to watch series 5 without waiting until January or February or whenever Netflix plans to release it on streaming. I express my gratitude to the YT user who even made a second account just to be able to give us updates of the newest episodes (the episodes on her original account were deleted). I won't be able to rewatch any of the previous episodes of series 5 until they're available on Netflix, but that's all right.

Oh man. So much adrenaline. I didn't care so much for the actual episode because it was a bit slow and uneventful, but I get why it was necessary. Unfortunately, though, I gave myself a spoiler for the end of the next episode... pah. Oh well. 

I think I just need to remember that this upcoming week is the last week I have to myself before my brother rolls in again on Saturday. After that, I won't have much privacy, because he'll be hovering when he's not occupied with something else. 

Now, regarding the second thing that has me flustered... yes. This has been going on for maybe 2-3 days now, but I don't know what to do with myself, because my energy is scattered. This happens every now and then in what seems like cycles - I'll be intensely productive or interested in something (writing, drawing, playing a certain game, watching some kind of TV or film), and then that productivity and interest fades. I'm then left wondering what to do, despite having the enthusiasm. Right this moment I'm very interested in working on Eron stuff, or playing Sims or something, but the motivation is lacking... as if I know I'll get bored. It's very frustrating because I'm the type of person who always has to be doing something - otherwise, my mood goes down the drain. That's why I'm blogging now... because I need something in which to channel my energy and this was the best option. 

While I'm here, I guess I'll mention something that I've been thinking about ever since I read about it on tumblr: calcified pineal glands. I've mentioned this before but kind of let it go because other things were on my mind. Now that I've stumbled across it again, it's been inhabiting my thoughts.

This tumblr post basically discussed ways to decalcify and activate the pineal gland. It was disheartening to discover that a good majority of things on the list were incorporated into my lifestyle (mainly diet things). Here are some of those things:

•  Cheese, yogurt, ice cream 
• Meat (although sparingly, and rarely - if ever - red meat)
• Soda (I only drink ramune, which is a light soda, and only a few times a month)
• Eggs
• Fish & shrimp, which contain mercury (apparently, mercury is a poison to the pineal)
• Fluoride (in my tap water and current toothpaste, although I plan to switch my toothpaste after it's gone)
• Other toxins such as refined sugar, mouthwash, and deodorant

When you think about it, though, it makes sense. One could argue that it's natural for us to eat meat and fish, but milk products of another animal? Eggs? That definitely seems a bit odd to me. Maybe eggs are a bit more natural to eat (since other animals consume them), but milk products... definitely unnatural. 

I'm in quite the predicament here. Especially since I could never part with fish. I want to give my body a better diet, eating more plant-based foods... but is decalcifying my pineal that important to me? The only reason I would want to do it is so I could reacquire my body's natural sensitivity. 

Now, my stomach is already sensitive. IBS stuff. Sometimes I just deal with the pain to eat what I want. And no matter how much I want to eat a diet mainly consisting of plant-based foods, I still can't help but worry that I'll be too attached to all the stuff I'm accustomed to - especially fish (sushi!) and pasta. I pay close attention to my cravings each day and find that the majority of those cravings (I'd say 90-95%) are for carbs and proteins (mainly carbs). 5% of those cravings are for fruit, veggies, or dairy products like yogurt. If I hardly crave fruits and veggies, how will I convince myself to eat them as much as I eat pasta, sushi, and other proteins/carbs? Is it just something that I'll have to wean myself on? That will take a lot of dedication and strict rules? Probably. That's how it always is, right?

I guess that's where mindful eating comes into play. I've been practicing the art of mindful eating for a while now, and have found that, for the most part, it does prevent me from eating a lot more during the day. Sometimes, not so much. So if I'm aiming for a plant-based diet, will I have to program my body to enjoy that instead? 

I remember reading all those articles about spiritual development/awakening and how one should expect their dietary needs to change drastically during the process. That never really happened with me. Not to a significant degree, anyway. Although I wanted to eat more plant-based foods, my body never demanded it. It was perfectly okay with pasta, fish, eggs, a bit of processed junk, and dairy (at least products that weren't extremely milk-heavy), with fruits and veggies mixed in when desired. Although one big change did happen: I grew less fond of meat.. especially steak. I used to crave steak so often - used to yearn for one after seeing an image - but now I don't think twice about it. 

It's definitely a big question. Maybe if my diet was as horrible as that of many other Americans, this would be more of a deal to me. I don't know if I should just continue following my cravings like I've always done, or make major alterations to my diet, despite having cravings for other things. Most of my cravings are for standard nutrients like proteins, carbs, fiber, vitamin C, etc. Yes, I do occasionally crave something sweet, but not anything that's heavy in fat, like cake (I actually avoid cake now, unless in small doses... can't handle rich sweets that well). Chocolate, of course.

I do know that once mom gets back into her raw diet, I'll be coming with her to the farmer's market and making an investment in foods and snacks that are actually good for me. She's just waiting till all the holiday stuff and trips are over so that she can make solid progress.

Hmmm. Decisions, decisions...

Before I run off and figure out what to do with myself, I wanted to mention that I'm feeling inclined for an artistic challenge of sorts: a drawing a day for 2013. There are many days when I don't draw... especially when I'm on break (for obvious reasons). But I still do want to improve my art skills, and if I'm going to do that, I need to keep practicing outside of school. So yeah. Will keep this in mind... 

Here's another Eron-themed tune from TSFH: "Blizzard," which I feel also suits the story very well:

 

The Horror of Salt and Butter

On Friday evening, my padre went to go see a film with a few of his coworkers (Skyfall). But I wasn't expecting him to return with a nearly-full bag of popcorn. 

I admit: I have a weakness for salt and butter. As much as I hate what it does for my body (and in most cases, I reject it), I'm secretly satisfied when I can get my hands on popcorn or garlic butter pasta. Of course, I keep my intake minimal, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy it when I do eat it. 

Now look at this image. Is that not the most beautiful thing you've ever seen? Is it not amazing to think that nature gifts us with such nourishing pieces of beauty? I look at that and want to eat it all. How can anyone want to eat salt, fat, and butter when we have all that? Those colors! 

Oh, man. My poor body is shrieking for those lovely, lustrous fruits. 

Unfortunately, it was also shrieking last night thanks to me downing the majority of that bag of popcorn. I was trying to fall asleep, but my churning gut kept me awake. For a while, I thought that I might have to get up and dash to the bathroom. But eventually, it calmed down.

Okay. Here's the thing about me and plant-based food: I'm far too used to complex flavors, like many other people. We're raised on them. We get used to pasta dishes with a variety of sauces, meats with a variety of marinades, deserts with a variety of cremes and fruits. Pizza is a fabulous example. Bread mixed with dairy mixed with veggie/fruit mixed with meat. 

I already mentioned in my previous food-related post that I like variety in my diet. Complex flavors are a perfect way to satisfy this. So when it comes to plant-based foods, I don't frequently crave the simple flavors. In fact, I don't crave the flavors at all. I just crave the nutrients. Just like last night - after I downed that bag of popcorn, my body was pleading with me for some greens, but we only had a browning salad bag in the fridge, so that request was denied. 

So my problem with produce lies in flavor. 

Last night, however, really pushed me into wanting a better diet. I'm still practicing mindful eating (although these past couple days I've been a bit lenient due to all the crap I'm doing), so I wonder: if I applied this to a new, better, plant-based diet, would I not need as much to eat?

My mom is currently on a low-calorie diet. I think she only eats something like 1150 calories a day. According to her, the beginning of the diet was tough because it wasn't enough food. Eventually, though, her body got used to the minimal amount of food, and she found she wasn't as hungry. Sometimes, she would even have to force herself to eat when she wasn't hungry, just to fulfill her calorie intake. She has one "splurge" day a week.

I'm guessing the same thing would apply to me. Before mindful eating, I tended to "inhale" my fruits & veggies, too. So they didn't really have the chance to let their fiber satiate me. Maybe... if I just began eating lots of plant-based foods, and really focused on the mindful eating and being grateful for it, I'll be okay. When I think about it, eating natural foods is quite the spiritual experience - essentially, you are eating a piece of your own flesh for nourishment. 

I can still eat some complex foods along with this. I'll never give up sushi, that's for sure - and I'll never give up pasta. I can eat rice, fresh and dried fruits, veggies, pasta, fish, bread, nuts, certain types of dairy (yogurt & certain types of cheeses), soups... I just really, really want a better diet. I'm sick of the stomachaches. I don't want to think what all this processed crap has done to my system. 

So I think after this final week of school, I'll sit down and make a list of all the good things I want to focus on eating and work on adjusting my diet over winter break - although that may prove to be a  challenge with Thanksgiving and Yule around the corner.

This will happen, damn it. In fact, I'll write it in my magic journal. Oh yeah~

Okay. This was a procrastination post, so I REALLY need to get busy now.

Evaah 

  

Mindful Eating

by bigartisteswings @ deviantART

Day after day, I keep thinking about my diet. When I'm in school, I eat bars (oatmeal, nuts, fruit filling, etc.) in between classes, and then have an actual meal when I come home. I'm very grateful to my mom, because she makes me tasty dishes... pastas and soups and whatnot (mainly pasta, because I freaking love it and need the carbs). Although she did admit this quarter that the only reason she's making me food now is because she's on a diet that fills up the freezer with her frozen meals, leaving no space for me to have my own. But I don't care. I prefer her dishes over that frozen crap. 

I really want a better diet. The more I become aware of things, the more I realize just all the crap that I'm putting into or on my body. Chemicals, chemicals, chemicals. Corn syrup. Preservatives. Harsh irritants. Et cetera.

The only problem is, I'm so used to this junk that it's hard to detach myself. Being in school makes it more challenging to incorporate the good things - not only because of a lack of time, but because of a lack of money, too. Buying produce from Wal-Mart isn't the same as buying produce from a farmer's market. 

What sucked about this quarter is that because I skipped lunch during my 4-day school week, I wouldn't get a lot of the nutrition I need. I would eat those bird/rabbit food bars for light snacks just to keep my stomach quiet and then would come home and eat a meal, plus whatever nutrients I craved that evening. Most of the time, it's protein and carbs. So I would eat things like imitation crab meat, noodles, eggs, or lunchable-style crackers. I wouldn't crave fruit and veggies. 

I really only crave fruit & veggies once every 1-2 weeks or so. Sometimes I can go a bit longer. But this is crap, because I know how important these two food groups are. It's hard to eat these things, however, when I'm not craving them. I haven't had any big problems lately, but I think I'd feel a lot better if I was eating Gaia's finest (or somewhat finest) over fake crab meat and high-sodium noodles. 

Which brings me to my main point: mindful eating. This is something that's been recently brought closer to my attention. I "learned" about it more than a year ago, but never really adopted the practice for whatever reason. I think, though, I'm going to start  utilizing it, because I think it could be beneficial, especially when eating fruit & veggies. I'm one of those people who eats in front of her computer... usually watching an episode of something. I also tend to eat quickly, for two main reasons: 1.) because I usually have something else to do, and 2.) because I don't want to waste food. Fortunately, my parents raised my brother and I to stop eating when we're comfortable. But these days, because I don't eat as much and therefore have a smaller stomach when I come home from school, I know that I won't be able to finish a dish if I eat slowly, and therefore "inhale" it so that I know I won't waste it. I'm sure someone's thinking: "why not save it for later?"

But see, I already have leftovers, and I'm not a fan of storing and reheating something that's already been stored and reheated. My mom tends to make enough servings for anywhere from 3 days to an entire week so that she doesn't have to worry about cooking too often. And once leftovers get to be a week old, I don't want to eat them. So I eat quickly to ensure I finish it all.

So I'm going to practice mindful eating. I want to enjoy my food, not inhale it. The only thing I'm kind of iffy about is practicing this with food that's not good for me, like processed stuff, because I feel like I'd be teaching my body to enjoy chemicals and preservatives, and I don't want that. Therefore, I'll only do this with foods that are good for me. 

Agh, 21st century... you and your poisonous foods. 

Evaah